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When Life gives us apples when we desire oranges!

Life always seems to present us with innumerable challenges and problems on a daily basis. It throws left hooks when we were expecting right ones; it gives us apples when we desire oranges; it even presents us with seemingly awful surprises that we weren’t expecting, and it bloats us with unresourceful emotions that tend to tie us down to a life of mediocrity and unhappiness.

Do you remember early last year when we first heard about COVID19? We were confused,devastated and lost. For a moment we felt the world was coming to an end..the second coming of Jesus? Many wondered..

After a month we could not go to work anymore, we had to work from home, literally waking up and creating an office in your house.This came with its challenges.You could not concentrate for a minute before you were tempted to open the fridge to grab something .

Salary was cut, meaning everything had to be re-planned..if you used to shop for 5k monthly you needed plan be of how 2k would run you through the month. Things were really tough. Still are..

Our parents in shagz were so worried about us in town because by then the monster had not reached the village and they believed it was a city ‘thing’ The best they did was to pray and send us fresh food from shags at least to sustain us…

Then came the lock down! ..yaani tulifungiwa Nairobi…. Wah! Now we couldn’t even travel any other county.. schools were closed, companies shut, literally life came to a standstill. That’s when we realized this virus had not come to play rather to finish us..all this time the touch of Ithaca not been felt by many…you could neither tell nor know of a person who died of COVID..but as days passed we were thrown into total confusion and state of despair for we started losing close friends,family members,colleagues,neighbors et al.. it was tough..very tough.

This virus kept mutating itself leaving us in oblivion there were new variations month after month. we are now on the 3rd one, Delta!…wearing face masks became mandatory, shaking hands became a thing of the past..you either waved or ‘gotad’. Life took a totally different angle and so we had to adjust to a lot of things. Lonesome we must say.

It’s been many tough months, but God’s grace has been sufficient for us. Heartfelt condolences to those who have lost loved ones.

We shall rise again… As it’s always dark before dawn!

When pushed to the lowest point don’t stay there..it’s not about how many times we get knocked down it’s how many times we rise..in fact when you knocked down nine times..rise up ten times!

Life itself is a journey of self-discovery, and not just a mere combination of small destinations. It is a never-ending journey that has many unexpected turns, twists, and surprises that make it worthwhile and fun.

When facing obstacles and challenges in your life, it is important to understand that you are on a journey and that no one event or circumstance determines how your journey will pan-out over the course of a week, month, year or longer.

We do not exist just for the sake of existing. Instead, we do because we are here to learn,experience and mature as productive and intelligent human beings.

Every problem or obstacle we face has been presented to us for the purpose of teaching life lessons that will allow us greater clarity of thought as we progress forward along our journey towards the attainment of our goals and objectives. Therefore, don’t look down and frown upon the problems that you face, instead turn your frown 🙁 upside-down 🙂 and take time to learn from your challenges in ways that will expand your thinking and improve your predicament. When life throws you lemons, make lemonade..and enjoy!

As a final thought, I leave you with a famous poem that I once read which enabled me to cultivate the attitude of persistence within my heart. I hope you enjoy it.

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
And the road you’re trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit,
Rest if you must, but don’t you quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As every one of us sometimes learns.
And many a failure turns about
When he might have won had he stuck it out.
Don’t give up though the pace seems slow,
You may succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than it seems
To a faint and faltering man.
Often the struggler has given up when he
Might have captured the victor’s cup,
And he learned too late when the night slipped down,
How close he was to the golden crown.

Success is failure turned inside out,
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are.
It may be near when it seems afar.
So stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit.
It’s when things seem worst that
You musn’t quit.

Everything happens for a reason. Life puts you down,only so you can get back up for the better things. Live life,forgive and forget. Let go of the past.

ITS YOUR TIME TO SHINE!!

It’s your time to shine!!!

Have you ever felt like you are an old book sitting in a shelf and now is just picking you up? Have you ever felt alone and lonely while everyone else is running off and getting married and having babies while you watch Netflix and eat ice cream every weekend? Have you ever felt that no one will ever even like you?

Well now is your time to shine. It’s your time to be the star that makes men or women swoon. No you don’t need to get celebrity good looks or you don’t need to be a fake airhead to get people liking you, all you need to do is to be YOU

The Path to Love

OK, so you’re here because you’ve felt lonely, alone and unloved. You have felt just like how I have felt before, envious of sweet couples who show public display of affection and cuddle in parks and malls. You have wondered where is Mr/Ms Right is and why hasn’t he or she found you yet. I felt that way too sometimes back.

But I woke up one day feeling great. I rushed to the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror and I realized that I was young, vibrant, talented, beautiful and happy. I was blessed with so many things that I haven’t seen because I was focusing on how alone and lonely I felt. I decided to change how I felt.

I know it may be hard for everyone to have that moment where they just jump out of bed and feel absolutely sane and happy, but you have to choose to feel this way in order for you to find the path to love.

1. Have a daily mantra – You know how those Buddhist Monks keep their cool despite all the aggressions in life? They meditate and they recite mantras. Mantras are affirmations that you can tell yourself everyday. When you do this, you program your head to feel happy and look at the bright side. You can have a mantra that says:

I’m beautiful and I attract positive energy and love.
I’m happy and I have a great soul in me and people want to be around me.
I’m fabulous!
I choose to be HAPPY!
I’m loving and sweet and anyone is lucky to have me.

When you recite these mantras you get to the mode of “I think, therefore I am”.

2. Be more open – Sometimes people tend to see you as too closed up that is why they don’t approach you. If you are a more open person, people will see you as approachable and kind. Positive energy will buzz in you and this will invite a possible mate to like you. Try to be more helpful and kind to others. Aside from helping those who are in need, being friendly also helps you feel better.

3. Don’t wait for love – I know you may ask why should you not wait for love, but the more you wait the more it does not come. Yes invite LOVE but don’t wait for it to the point of desperation. Don’t place your happiness on finding a mate. If you do this, then you will sink into the hole of loneliness.

You need to be busy while you are inviting love into your life. You need to have fun. Because if you wait for love like waiting for the dentist to remove a rotten tooth, then it would feel miserable waiting.

4. Work on yourself – Have you ever felt fugly and unattractive? Attractiveness does not have anything to do with looks! I have known super hot ladies who call themselves fat even though they are just a size 4. I have seen voluptuous beauties strut their stuff like a Parisian model.

You need to amp up your game and shine. To shine, you need to feel happy with how you look and feel. You need to invest time on your appearance too. You need to wear clothes that make you happy. You also need to do the things you like. This will give you the natural glow you need.

5. Believe in the Law of Attraction – I have read this book Manifestation Miracle and has really made me believe that anything and everything is possible. It has made me believe that love begets love and positivity begets positivity. I actually recommend the book and I know you can learn from it.

Why Do I Need to Shine?

A lot of women have shifted their beliefs that they don’t need to do anything in order to find love. Well technically, love comes naturally, but it also needs some work. If you go out wearing your sweats and don’t shower will you like you? If your hair is super oily and your armpits smell will you feel confident? Well probably not.

This is the very reason why you need to shine. The most important person in your life is none the less YOU. And if you YOU are the most important person in your life, then you need to invest time, money and effort on yourself. I don’t mean to turn into an airhead and just paint your face, it goes beyond that.

1. You need to shine to fall in love with yourself – Have you ever felt completely and utterly in love with who you are or do you dread looking at the mirror? You need to shine because you are a precious and wonderful and you are YOU.

2. You need to shine because no one else will do it for you – You cannot ask people to make you happy, only you can make you happy. Happiness is infectious. Happy people are addictive and wonderful that others just want to be near them. If you want to find love, you have to be happy first.

3. You need to shine for your friends and family – I know Your Prince Charming may not be here yet but you do have angels around you! Your friends and your family deserve the best version of you too – the happy and shiny version of you! They are your support system and you need to give them good vibes.

4. You need to shine for you future LOVE – He may just be around the corner but he or she is too intimidated by your frown. You need to shine because he or she needs to know how wonderful you are. If you shine from the heart, it will vibrate positively and call the cupids of heaven to find the love you deserve.

Shine! Shine! Shine!

I know love can be tragic; you have gotten burned before or you may have been hurt before but that should not turn you into a bitter and hateful person. You may also have waited so long for love that you have felt that it will never come and you just feel like an old book left in the shelf. But still you need to choose positivity.

If you want love, you need to shine. You need to shine because love is a shiny thing too!

TO THINE OWN SELF BE TRUE.

We live in a world that constantly tells us what to do, how to act, what to be. Knowing how to be true to yourself and live the life you want can be a challenge.

When someone asks how we are, we assume that the person does not mean the question sincerely, for it would lead to an in depth conversation. So telling them that you are good or fine, even if you’re not, is the usual answer.

In an ideal world, we would stop and truly listen. We wouldn’t be afraid to be ourselves. Instead, when we answer about how we are doing, our mask, the persona we show the world, tightens. Sometimes even more so than it might have been before. Eventually, it becomes hard to take off, even when you’re alone.

Imagine a world where we asked how someone was doing and they really told us. Imagine a world where there were no masks, only transparency when we talked to one another.

If you want to live in a world that celebrates who you are, mistakes and all, take off the mask. It doesn’t mean you have to be positive or fine all the time.

According to a Danish psychologist, Svend Brinkman, we expect each other to be happy and fine every second, and we expect it of ourselves. And that “has a dark side Positive psychology can have its perks but not at the expense at hiding how you truly feel in order to remain seemingly positive to others.

No one can feel positive all the time and yet that is what our culture teaches us to embrace. We have to unlearn this. That said, telling others you are ‘“fine”’ all the time is actually detrimental to your wellbeing, because it stops you from being assertive, from being authentic or your truest self.

“When you acknowledge a feeling, it leads you to the problem that’s causing that feeling; and once you identify the problem, you can find a solution to it. When you hide that feeling, you stuff it way down so no one can help you.You can’t even help yourself.

Feelings are there for one reason: to be felt. That doesn’t mean you have to act on that feeling. It just means that you start the process of problem solving so you can live the life you want.

Embrace Your Vulnerability

When you are your true self, you can better self-advocate or stand up for what you need. Your self-expression matters, and you should value your voice. It’s okay to need things, it’s okay to speak up, and it’s okay not to be okay.

Telling someone you are simply “fine” when you are not, does your story and your journey a great disservice. Being true to yourself entails embracing all aspects of your existence.

When you bring your whole self to the table, there is nothing that you can’t beat.

Can you take off the mask?

This is the toughest thing anyone can do. We have learned to wait until we are safe before we start to be authentic.

In relationships especially, this can be hard. Some people avoid vulnerability at any cost. And in our relationship with ourselves, we can look in the mirror and immediately put on the mask.

It all starts with your story. You have been on your own unique journey. That journey has led you here, to the person you are today. You have to be unafraid, and embrace all aspects of that journey.

You should seek to thrive, not just survive. That means you do not have to compete or compare yourself with anyone.

Authenticity means you are enough. It’s enough to be who you are to get what you want.

What if for the first time ever, you were real? What if you said what you wanted to say, did what you wanted to do, and didn’t apologize for it?

Do What Makes You Happy When No One’s Looking

Being the best version of you has nothing to do with your success or your status. It has everything to do with your Character, what you do when no one’s looking.

In order to create the life you want, you have to be the person you want to be. Faking it till you make it is just a way to white knuckle it through your journey. You have the fire inside of you to make things right, to put the pieces together, to live authentically. And Character is how you get there.

If you fall down and you help another up while you’re down there, it’s like you rise twice.

Along with attitude, your character is about the choices you make rather than what happens to you.

Yes, it’s about doing the right thing even when obstacles seem insurmountable. It’s about using that mountain you’ve been given to show others it can be moved. It’s about being unapologetically you, taking control, choosing your attitude in adversity and being the best version of you to create the life you want.

How do you know what you really want? Is it truly status or success?

Unfortunately, these things do not always bring happiness. And aspects of our image or “performance driven existence” may not achieve satisfaction. Materialism is part of our refusal to accept ourselves as enough. All the things we use to repress our true selves are about being enough.

“Enoughness” is what we truly seek, but ego gets in the way.

Ego is the perception of self as outer worth. It’s not REAL self worth.

Ego represses our true self with a new self— the self of chasing ‘“Am I ever enough?”’ questions. And instead of filling our true selves with self-love and acceptance, when we “should ourselves” and chase “enoughness,” we feed the ego or our image.

It’s important to realize YOU ARE ENOUGH, without all the material trappings.

By being yourself, you are being brave. By acknowledging all you can be, you tell the universe that you can until you believe it too. The steps are easy, and you are worth it. All of it is about the purpose you are leading and the passion that is your fuel.

Being true to yourself is all about mastering how to live life authentically rather than faking or forcing it. Having the life you want (and deserve) is about being trusting in yourself and the purpose you are living for. Both need passion behind it, fueling it each second, or you will experience burn out.

When you are authentic, you can call the road you walk your own. When you live your life for you and not just the results of all your actions (faking it till you make it), you can let go of what you don’t need. This clarifies and pushes purpose to you, living for something that is greater than you.

You will find that making decisions based on what will actually achieve your goals, will help you attain the life you want, and your success with each step, will allow you to enjoy the process.

ITS NOT TOO LATE!

Happy new Month!

It’s amazing how time really flies..can you believe that the budget 2019 has already been read? Well personally I’m shocked we are in the 7th month of the year.

At the beginning of the year we had a lot of resolutions; save more, get a job,loose weight, make new friends….and many more. Some have achieved this, others struggling and many feeling it’s too late to accomplish anything this year.

Listen!

I’m here to tell you it’s not too late…

Ever heard the saying ‘Change is the only constant’?

Everyone without a doubt goes through changes in their lives whether it be a physical state of literal aging, or a mental state of emotional maturity, or regression in some cases. They all nonetheless signify change, yet some of us seem to embrace it better than others.

I have to admit that when it comes to change, I’m not the most accepting. Don’t get me wrong. I love a challenge and am not one to sit still and stay stagnant. Yet, the soothing feeling of being in my ‘comfort zone’ is also one that makes embracing change a lot harder, especially when the change I’m about to make is not easy, and perhaps even something that I dislike.

Fear of uncertainty kicks in and I start wondering if it’s too much sacrifice that I have to make. Perhaps I’m better off staying put where I’m at. Sound familiar?

Have you ever been in a situation where you know that things just aren’t working out? Whether it’s in your personal relationships or career development, you’re feeling somewhat stuck and unhappy with the way things are.

You need that change, yet you’re afraid to make the conscious decision to move because perhaps you’re not even sure of what it is that you need to change! Or you’re afraid it’s too late to have a fresh start, to begin again.

You might have been with the same company for the last 5 years, in the same position, doing the same thing and it’s not that you dislike your work. But, the thought of doing the same thing for the next 5 or 10 years scares you. You want to do more or perhaps even something completely different altogether.

Or you could already be late into adulthood, where you’ve established a good career path and you’ve got a lot going on, such as a family to care for. You’re financially stable and could potentially be working towards your next promotion. But, somehow you’re not quite satisfied with what you’ve achieved.

There’s just something missing. And yet it feels like it’s too late to leave all that stability behind to embark on a completely new journey of discovery.

Why is that so many of us find ourselves limiting our windows of opportunity and potential because we think it’s too late to start afresh–or

It’s Not Too Late!

Well the good news is, that as our society continues to develop at such a rapid pace, it also means we have more opportunities to do things that were previously thought impossible if you were of a certain age, or past a certain phase in life. These days, more individuals are pushing the boundaries and breaking stereotypes.

I’m not just talking about age. Sure, age is only a state of mind–a social construct that should not determine or limit your capabilities and ambitions. But there’s more. It goes beyond external factors like time and age. It’s about you, and your ability to accept challenges and having the determination to break free from your existing situation.

To break free from our limitations, we’ve got to take a step back and gain a fresh perspective on just what limitations really are. On the surface, limitations are things that prevent you from doing something, but if you dig deeper, you’ll find that limitations are the things that keep you constrained inside a loop.

They keep you stuck facing the same problems, having the same choices, and taking the same actions over and over, and over again. Limitations define the quality of your life. So if you want to improve your life, then you must break free from the limitations that keep you in the same loop everyday, month, and year.

It may seem that the limitations that you’re facing are out of your control–or something that just happens to you. But, your reality is derived from your perception.

It’s not reality that’s important, but rather, how you perceive your reality. Being able to control how you look at things is the key to breaking free, and starting over again. Shaping your perception is so powerful that just a small change in perspective can completely change everything–from your motivation, outlook, self esteem to your limitations!

You can learn to take control of your limitations and take control of your dreams.

CELEBRATE YOURSELF!

Happy Monday!

Most of us have something specific that we are working towards. Usually it’s a big milestone, whether it’s quitting your job in order to pursue another opportunity or getting the promotion you’ve been vying for. Once you get that, then you’ll feel successful, and you won’t be as hard on yourself (right?). Until then, you grind it out every day.

The problem with that mentality is you might never feel satisfied, even when you hit your goal, and you’ll develop a callous attitude. You feel jealous of those around you that are moving at a faster pace, and you’re always getting down on yourself. In order to keep yourself motivated and most importantly happy, you need to celebrate yourself on a daily basis. That starts with assessing your day. Ask yourself, did I do something today that will bring me closer to my goal? If the answer is yes, celebrate that! If it’s no, then celebrate that you’re going to be amazing tomorrow! Tell yourself you’re doing a good job and applaud yourself for staying focused.

Don’t be too hard on yourself. Just remember that we are human beings. That we are, each one of us, extremely valuable just the way we are. That includes all our characteristics, regardless of how we might label them. Co-dependency is just a label, a way of defining how we, as humans, learn to cope with life, relationships, emotions, and events. Some of what we’ve learned can be unlearned. Some of what we’ve learned can be kept or expanded or changed to fit our particular situation or relationships.

The wonderful news is that YOU get to decide what you need to change, and YOU get to determine how and when. Recovery is all about self-examination, growth, experimentation, keeping what works for the moment, and moving ahead with life at your own pace.

One of the traps we can fall into is letting others define our self-worth, define our meaning, or tell us how we ought to change our lives for the better. Often, we let those closest to us do this, when we should be doing this for ourselves. Sure, we can learn about ourselves from others, but remember that others tend to see us through their own filters. Often, we end up feeling like failures because we didn’t live up to someone else’s expectations of us.

But you can step outside all of that stuff and keep your sense of self-worth and value—that’s the beautiful thing. you get to discover exactly who you are and what you want. You get to treat yourself the way you want to be treated and look for others who will treat you the way you know you deserve to be treated—with kindness, respect, patience, love, and encouragement. Those wonderful types of relationships are out there, waiting just for you.

BE YOU.THE WORLD WILL ADJUST.

Many times we forget to be ourselves or even worse, choose not to be true to ourselves by imitating others.

Amongst the books that I am currently reading, “The Atonement Child” by Francine Rivers is one of them. The book is so sad, like I told one of my reading pals that this book just unleashes a cocktail of emotions all at once…I wont go too deep into it, as I havent done reading it. Though I will share the part that made me think very hard . This lady by the name of Dynah got raped on her way back from work to her school res, it was a cold January night. After couple of days she discovered that she is pregnant, the doctor told her about the procedure especially if one has been raped, she didnt pitch for the procedure, she broke the engagement with her fiance because he wanted her to abort it. She got kicked out of school because it is against the institution policy to have pregnant ladies on campus. She had to go home, her parents didnt know the tragedy that she experienced. As soon as she told them the first thing they thought was for her to terminate it. They thought of how the church people will perceive them as their only daughter became pregnant before being married. Her mother did an abortion long time ago just to keep her boyfriend and to show her aunts that she is a good girl. But even after 20+ years, it still haunts her, all alone, it will never leave her. Even though she was now married to a very goo man and they have a lovely daughter Dynah, the hole inside her heart will never be filled up. I will pause right here, What I picked up from the piece that I just shared with you is that most of the time we do things so that the society can accept us.It seems like its not about themselves BUT other people, WHY though??? Their energy is about how will the church people think of them, they are not thinking of “What is the right thing to do?”

We forget that the things we do for temporary fulfillment, normally the consequences haunt one for as long as possible, it will always be in your mind, not in the society’s mind unfortunately.

No matter what you are going through, solutions that are just for now are not worth it. Many times we do things so that we adjust to the world… when will we stop that and let the world adjust to us. The nicest thing about the world is that it can adjust to anything you want it to be.Many times we conform to what society wants or what society is doing. We do things to impress people who dont even notice our efforts. We tend to forget that identity lost is just as the same as identity shredded. ALWAYS REMEMBER: Its not too late to pick up the pieces and be YOURSELF…be you…the world can always adjust to anything, so instead of you adjusting to the world, let the world adjust to you. You are a piece of a puzzle, if you are unclear the puzzle will not be complete.

The day and moment we stop being replicas of others, we will enjoy this thing called life… when we become our own selves … when I become me and you become you, just they way we were all supposed to be. Following our purpose. This can only be possible if you introspect yourself, alone…identify who you really are…where are you from?….where do you want to be?…what are you good at?….what you want out of life?….what are your dreams and aspirations.?..These questions will help you…but you also need to get up and DO … its all about DOING….we can all wish and dream…only the few get up and SMELL the coffee…only the few dusts off themselves and walk towards all that they want and toward who they are really are…

God never made duplicates. You were created with a purpose, and that purpose is not to conform to society, that purpose it for you to be you… that purpose is to use your talents to glorify Him always. Your purpose has to be a blessing to the world, so imagine now when you hide that by living someone’s life instead of yours, the world ends up running short of blessings….

“Always be a first rate version of yourself and not a second rate version of someone else.”- Judy Garland

Stop rating yourself below good, you are not average. The truth of the matter is the version of you is the BEST…You will only depreciate when you demote yourself from who you truly are. The misconception of who you are comes when you are untrue to what is really you…

One of the easiest thing that I have learned in life is to be yourself and never compromise that. Being yourself is so fulfilling. Its one of the the healthiest ways to live life…its better than the gym and healthy eating… You must still take care of that body, but never forget about your thoughts…your purpose and your dreams

“The easiest thing to be in the world is you. The most difficult thing to be is what other people want you to be. Don’t let them put you in that position.”- Leo Buscaglia

KEEP PUSHING; IT WILL HAPPEN!

#MondayMonday

Life is a struggle. Life will throw curve balls at you, it will humble you, it will attempt to break you down. And just when you think things are starting to look up, life will smack you back down with ruthless indifference.

The reason most people never achieve their dreams is because they simply give up. Life was never meant to be easy – its a constant struggle, with extreme lows and highs. Remember that the times when its most important to persevere are the times that you will be most tested.

Are things not going the way you expected them to go? If the answer is yes, I know that feeling, but I’ve come with one message for you… Don’t give up, you’ll make it.

When we encounter obstacles or challenges, depending on how we see them, we mostly do one of these two; we either;

1. talk about it and do nothing or

2. we think about how to overcome it and do something about it.

Now if we see it as an obstacle, we mostly go with option 1.

But if we see it as a challenge, we go with option 2, thereby turning the challenge into a stepping stone for success.

If Thomas Edison had to try 1000 times before he was able to invent a light bulb, then why give up when things fail to work the first or the second time?

Look around you, can you see a light bulb?Ask yourself, how many times have you tried? And why are you willing to give up? What’s stopping you from persisting until you make it?

Now, the most fascinating thing about Edison’s reply to his 1000 unsuccessful attempts was and I quote:

“I didn’t fail 1000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1000 steps.”

You see that? He didn’t see the unsuccessful attempts as an obstacle but as a stepping stone.

You can’t give up because you tried two times, or five times, or ten times, or even twenty times, and you haven’t had success yet, keep on trying, keep on pushing forward, and learn from the errors of past attempts, because that is the key to your breakthrough.

Nelson Mandela said, “It always seems impossible until it’s done.”

You can’t give up.

Look into the history and see how the first computer was made, how the first television was made, how the first car was made, how the first telephone was made.

You’ll see that all those were made by people who did not give up on their dreams regardless of the challenges they encountered.

So the next time you see a nice car and say oh I want this car, or oh I wish I had this car, keep in mind that, it’s a benefit of someone’s hard work and persistence.

And remember that if you don’t give up but persist, work hard, and stay true to your dreams, you’ll also have a success story, which would benefit generations now and those yet unborn.

“Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising which tempt you to believe that your critics are right. To map out a course of action and follow it to an end requires courage.”– Ralph Waldo Emerson.

Always remember, Don’t give up, You’ll make it.

WHAT IT MEANS TO TRULY LIVE.

Birthdays come and go, but it’s the most important time in anyone’s yearly calendar, where you sit to reflect on way forward as you continue aging.. I’m grateful on Friday the lord blessed me with yet another 365 day to make it count. So here is a few things I’m carrying with me this year on how to truly live.

There are too many people merely existing. They are just breathing bodies that go through the motions of the humdrum of everyday life, but they are not truly living. They’re not enjoying life. They stopped living before their hearts stopped beating.

Throughout the years, I have learned that living a meaningful life has nothing to do with how much money you make or the materialistic things that you possess. It has nothing to do with having the perfect body or being exceptionally beautiful.

To truly live life to the fullest, you need to start with appreciating everything that you are. Live your life being aware of all your imperfections but still loving yourself. Understand that those imperfections are part of who you are. Know that you don’t need to change anything about yourself to impress others. Understand that you may far from perfect but you are unique, because there’s only one you. To truly live is to be happy with the person that matters the most: you.

To truly live is to do everything that excites you. In order to truly live, you need to do what makes your heart happy. You need to do whatever it is you want to do, want to travel? Pack your bags and go. Do things you’ve always wanted to do.life is too short before you know it you 50, see at that age they are few things you can’t do.so time is Now! And of course within reason—(don’t go breaking the law or anything).😄

To truly live means to live in the moment and not waste your time dwelling on the past. Don’t dwindle on the “what if’s.” Living is about letting go of what has happened in the past and focusing on what you can do right now to have a better future.

To truly live means to appreciate everything around you. Take time to watch the sunrise, listen to the rain, play with the snow, or lie down on the grass and watch the clouds ease across the blue sky. When you truly live, you surrender yourself to the enchanting nature.

To truly live is to know how to control your emotions but also not to deny them. Accept that sometimes you will cry for no reason and that you will feel sadness and pain. Let your emotions flow within yourself. Letting yourself feel so you can heal is all part of truly living.

To truly live is to appreciate every moment. To find awesomeness and surprises in every day you live. Do your best in anything you do. Get up every day and try to make the best of it, because you don’t know if you’ll be here tomorrow. To truly live is to appreciate every millisecond of your life doesn’t matter how small.

To live is to spend time with friends and loved ones, to surround yourself with those that make you feel good and inspire you to do and be better.

To truly live is to do everything that you dream about. Make sure you chase your dreams and accomplish them. Never give up until you succeed. To truly live is to follow the direction you want to take in life. Build your own path and create your own destiny.

It is to see the good in the bad and understanding that good things will soon come. Know that not everything will be as you want, because life is never perfect. Deal with what is happening in your life, accept it, and try to make the best out of every situation.

To truly live is to be selfless. Being selfless is being kind and respectful to others, buying lunch for the person in line behind you, and writing letters to those close to you to let them know how much they mean to you. It’s when you compliment a stranger. It’s when you do one selfless act, big or small, every day.

To truly live is to try to make a difference in the world.

To truly live is to do things that make you feel alive, to feed happiness to your soul, and to bring meaning to your life.

You Want Happiness? It is Within You.

There’s always a point in our lives where we want to pause and think for a while. It may feel like everything is just so overwhelming; It feels so heavy that you just want to leave and throw off everything. Do you know why? Because you’re doing these things not for yourself and not because of you, but for the people around you.

Well, guess what? You are allowed to put yourself first. Living for other people would never give you a peaceful life. When you feel hurt, no one feels exactly what you feel, so why depend your happiness on other people?

You’ve done enough and you did well.

Now is the time to put yourself first. Stop holding back and do what will make your soul happy. You are mature enough to know what’s right and what’s not, so don’t dwell on what will people say. You don’t need validation from them. It’s your life honey, own it.

There’s nothing more rewarding than self-love.

Self-love is everything. It gives you the liberty to enjoy the things that make you whole. It is not being selfish, but rather being fair to yourself this time. You deserve the best that you give to other people.

Self-love means taking care of your physical, emotional, and mental health.

Make yourself a priority. No matter how much you want to consider helping and understanding other people, if you in the first place feels empty inside, there’s nothing more left to give.

Cut-off toxic people in your life.

Don’t let them take advantage of your good heart. You don’t feel like going out with a friend? Then don’t. Pushing yourself to do something you don’t want is unfair. Don’t feel like you owe people anything. It is time to eliminate those people that do not spark joy in your life and keep the ones who make you realize that life isn’t bad at all.

You deserve the best in this world.

Start waking up every morning and celebrate YOU. Make plans for yourself. Eat your favorite cake. Go to your favorite place. Spend time with your favorite person. Do what’s best for you and never feel guilty about it.

Purpose to Inspire!

People who reach exceptional heights may differ from each other, but one thing they all share is a clear goal, talents, aims their effort, and steers them into the right direction. A compelling purpose is the ambitious person’s true north, keeping him or her in the course. What purpose is worth pursuing? The most satisfying purpose empowers its pursuer to enlist others in a quest for some higher good.

_ James Champy and Nitin Nohria,

The arc of Ambition

Kenyan politics is frustrating; sometimes it is like drama where the curve suddenly and jarringly swings from romance to tragedy; at other times, it is like the annoying grating of metal upon metal.

Politicians, somehow, manage to puff themselves up to size through cunning, hook and crook. The rest of us cast permanent shadows of underachievers.

There is always someone faster, smarter, more powerful, more glamorous, and ruthless or smooth — who steal up all the limelight, appears in all headlines and is branded as the hero.

So we are fed on a constant stream of bizarre happenings on the political scene. The problem is that we are complicit in all this as we are responsible for electing hollow, boisterous and openly corrupt leaders, then we spend five years complaining about them, only to elect them again! Tribalism is the bane of this nation. We will choose the most crooked, anti-development, openly anti-reformist leaders just because they belong to our ethnic groups. How weird is this Kenyans?

Those in leadership do not like or encourage any kind of intellectual debate. This where the big problem is because if a leader can’t debate with “Wanjiku” then he is not a leader…he needs to be very smart both socially and intellectually.

Leadership isn’t about techniques or training only. If leaders don’t know who they are, insecurity and the need to stay on top will cause them to make unwise decisions, thus undermining the leadership they are trying to assert and establish. Or they’ll work themselves too hard, trying to be all things to all people so as not to fail in their leadership role.

Robert Greenleaf, in his book, on becoming a servant leader, stated; “This is the ultimate test: what values govern one’s life_ at the end of it?” He poses and interesting questions, don’t you think?

Are you developing a set of values that adjust over your lifetime as your leadership grows and matures? You shouldn’t wait until you are a leader to try and define this values, for by then you may not see the importance of such a task (“ I’m already a leader; why sweat the small stuff now when big decision await?”).If you wait too long to reflect on your values, you may find that you have already given so much energy to values that were not worth the energy that you gave them.

Here are the values that a good leader must seek;

Seek excellence
Be competent
Serve others
Seek the truth

If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.

Are you a leader?

SO MANY LEADERS….SO LITTLE LEADERSHIP!!

_ James Champy and Nitin Nohria,

The arc of Ambition

Kenyan politics is frustrating; sometimes it is like drama where the curve suddenly and jarringly swings from romance to tragedy; at other times, it is like the annoying grating of metal upon metal.

Politicians, somehow, manage to puff themselves up to size through cunning, hook and crook. The rest of us cast permanent shadows of underachievers.

There is always someone faster, smarter, more powerful, more glamorous, and ruthless or smooth — who steal up all the limelight, appears in all headlines and is branded as the hero.

Robert Greenleaf, in his book, on becoming a servant leader, stated; “This is the ultimate test: what values govern one’s life_ at the end of it?” He poses and interesting questions, don’t you think?

Here are the values that a good leader must seek;

Seek excellence

Be competent

Serve others

Seek the truth

If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.

Are you a leader?